True Love

On Friday I received a voicemail from my dear friend and life mentor, Carver. I was encouraged by his encouragement to keep writing; however, I have taken a break to ponder his comment after that. Take a few deep breaths, relax, let things happen. Yes, Carver and I met in a Yoga class. So, after my first date as a result of this blog, I am doing just that. Pondering. Less than twelve hours later I bought the audio book titled True Love by, um, OK, some Buddhist monk whose name I cannot recall. All the way back from Asheville, I tried to breath in and breath out and memorize his mantras. They seem so simple. "I am hurting, can you help me?" Or something like that. Profound, yet seems so simple. I am now going to replay the chapter on listening. Apparently, I was thinking about my date which failed to promise true love instead of vowing to truly listen to his words. So, Carver: I promise to at least TRY to calm down. Just like you suggested: today I am lounging with the cat being thankful that I am not staring at someone across the table with gravy running down their mouth. Maybe you should start a blog.

Iphone Trash Warning: MAY CAUSE YOU TO DELETE DATING PROSPECT'S EMAILS.

Oh the loneliness. The loneliness for the single lady (not the one Beyonce sings about) comes at night time. For me around 11:00PM, which happens to be about the same time my cat comes alive and starts talking to me for the first time of the entire day. I recently upgraded to an iphone and now use it as my security blanket to not feel so alone at bedtime. OK, one last check of the email. How do I do this again? Right, touch the mail button. Oh, there are three new emails! One from Obama, get those everyday. One from expedia, one from...ooohhhh. Can this be my new beau? After finally decoding the signals, I get the email to come up and start laughing so hard at his email that I drop the phone. When I pick it up again, it's gone. Where's his email? What? Calm down. Don't panic. You use gmail. Gmail doesn't delete. It doesn't have to. It stores everything you've ever sent into a secret place in space. Not so on the iphone. Oh no. There is a garbage can that looks like the one Oscar from Sesame Street used to live in. Plug in the computer. NOT THERE. How does this happen to me? How can I delete the first email from my first ever dating blog site? Why can't I just be cool? Come on Erin. You can do it. Think. Yes! There has to be a trash folder. Wait-there it is! It isn't lost! Love is once again a possibility! But I still have my pride. Pop the Ambien, try to forget about it, and not respond until the next day. Honestly, I am exhausted and have a headache and my cat wants me to keep throwing his toy so he can fetch it, but...yeah. I'm playing it cool. I can still hear the voice in my head of my girlfriends when we were 22. "What? He called you? That's great!" "I know. I'm about to call him back." "No, you can't do that. Wait until tomorrow." "Really, but I like him and he CALLED ME." "No. you have to wait." I'm 29 and feel worlds away from 22. Now, can we finally just stop the bullshit. It's exhausting me and I have to go now. My pizza is burning.

Jane Eyre: Chapter XVII

After Jane has not seen Mr. Rochester for ten days and has heard from Mrs. Fairfax that he might not show his face again at Thornfield for a year, Charlotte Bronte writes, "When I heard this I was beginning to feel a strange chill and failing at the heart. I was actually permitting myself to experience a sickening sense of disappointment; but rallying my wits, and recollecting my principles, I at once called my sensations to order; and it was wonderful how I got over the temporary blunder-how I cleared up the mistake of supposing Mr. Rochester's movements a matter in which I had any cause to take a vital interest."

Oh Jane. Don't fool yourself! Since you are so young in this chapter, I will give you a break and let you believe that one letter from that man wouldn't thrill your heart. Today, only two days after creating my new blog, I happily report my first prospect. And, no matter how cool I try to play it, I have to say that when I read my friend Beth's email, I was a bit excited. Oh yeah. That's me in the photo not looking excited. Deep breaths, we are all adults here. Check those insecurities at the state line and drive on through honey!

Interested? Stay tuned for the updates. Unlike the Bachelorette, you do not have to wait a week to see what will happen. After my two hour webinar on blogging today, (for work! Dear God-please make me a writer so I can fly far far away from here!) I learned that in order to get more buzz for my blog, I must update often. I vow to attempt to post at least a sentence daily.

Oh, and thanks to all of you who have sent a high five my way. Some of you, on the other hand, who have responded by, "that was an interesting few paragraphs you wrote last night" or "you have finally lost it" obviously needs to read up on here for a few giggles and a look into my true soul.

LOL! That was meant to be funny! Ok, I realize there are only a select few who get it. If you are one of those: stay tuned.

Love in a Spin Class?

Ok, yes. I know that I work in a "gym", but my job is not jumping around all day on the fitness equipment. (With the corporate wellness boom, I don't understand why people still refer to me as only a Personal Trainer or Aerobics Instructor). Anyway, my point is: I still need a place to work out. A place to go where all of my stress is burned right out of me. A place like spin class at the local Y. I go in and take a bike in the back. I try to keep a low profile when attending any fitness classes, especially cycling. I just never feel right. I can't get my seat right, the handle bars, the clips. It is just so overwhelming and I'm off the bike, on the bike, readjusting every second. No wonder my experience on a moving bike has not been so successful either. Ok, the music is starting. Finally. Hopefully this perky looking thing has some hard core rap on her mix so I can get all of this funk out of my system. Warm-up started with some Creed sounding band. Maybe it was Creed. Then, while I am trying to visualize the stress flowing out of me with every stroke of the pedal, she starts talking. "Woo! Oh, yea! We gotta start getting in shape for next summer already, right? Woo! That's it. Take it up to gear 13. Oh yea! Now, third position: arms forward, butt back. Come on." I'm sorry, but I am used to hearing the arms forward butt back instructions during different circumstances. Then some band comes on that she says is called Goo Roo Josh Project. Josh, no Joe, no Jack. Ok, thank God only 20 more minutes to go. That means only four bad songs. Fast forward to the last song Chasing Cars..is that the song or the band? Finally, the cool down! Oh no. Love is a Battlefield? Does that Jordan girl sing that? Then the instructor comments, "What does this teeny bopper song mean anyway. I don't know what it means, but it's a good song." What? Obviously you've never had your heart broken little missy. If so, maybe you would pick some better music. At least there were some people my age in the class, and if I wouldn't have snuck right out of there, I may could have met the one. See what I mean about dating these days? For those of you PlusOnes, It is more difficult than you think.

So, what are the deal breakers?

First, I'm still figuring out what the deal breakers are and trying to live in the moment; however, there are a few things that are non-negotiable. Like, a good sense of humor, caring to those less fortunate than you, and having an open mind. The other night I went on my first blind date and it took me two hours to get the guy to laugh. I mean, he did make a pretty good sarcastic joke, but come on! I have to be able to laugh and I appreciate original humor. Being able to laugh at yourself is a MUST. I seem to be provided with several opportunities a day to practice this, and I have learned that of course, there are appropriate times to make a joke and sometimes not, but most of the time laughing at yourself helps. As for some more laughs, checkout these pics of me doing all types of great fun things. I mean, this is a dating blog after all. I have to look like I have a life and that I live it looking cool. For example, some of the pics include dancing in New York, gardening, making funny faces, climbing mountains, you know...

What has Erin done now and why?

Ok, I admit it. Perhaps I wouldn't mind finding the love of my life if it meant that we could have separate apartments. Like, maybe right next door to each other. If you are reading this blog, you have been hand picked to help me find "the one". (Or so I think. I am not exactly sure how these blogging settings work and am just praying that my mom can't read this.) I have come to the point in my life where most of my friends have found a partner that they choose to share a life with-some for a lifetime and some for at least a little while. Regardless the fate of these unique relationships, it still keeps me wondering, "Why haven't I found one of those?" Granted, I have taken a path that includes a few curves and bumps along the road, but doesn't it at least count that those bumps have helped me figure out what I want? Ok, I know what I want. Check. Now what? I just hope to happen to bump into him at the grocery store or the dance floor? Although that does seem to work out for some people, there has got to be a better way. And, OK. Even if we don't want to admit it, haven't we all taken a wander around on match.com? I mean, it IS a big part of the way some of us find each other these days. But, how do you know what you are getting? How do you know he isn't some crazy? Ok-you're right. Experience proves that I may have not noticed some of those crazy ones in the past, but I now am an avid reader of reviews. I mean, I probably spent more time reading a review on my newly purchased washer and dryer than I did on my past suitors.

So, will you help me? Maybe everyone of your friends or boyfriend's friends are taken, but if they happen to have a job, drink less than two drinks a day, and their family isn't complete nuts-let me know! Just email me at datewitherin@gmail.com with the details. In the meantime, have them checkout this blog with my pics, interests, and what I'm looking for. And please, remember that if you know me, you know that I love to laugh and am hoping this at least brings a few laughs your way!!